This is not meant to be a “motivational pep talk”, I’m no cheerleader, I’m afraid. As a matter of fact I’ve grown a tad bit weary of the overly enthusiastic “RA RA”, always think positive “pom-pom wielding” peeps. Today, I’m here to stir your pot, and as a matter of fact I’ve just completed a long pot stirring session on myself.
I want to start of by saying this; No one outside of yourself can take credit for your successes(or failures). They can serve as a catalyst, inspire you to get moving or share some strategies and tools that can help you to take action. But the rest my friends is up to you. You alone are ultimately responsible for you.
I realize that may make me sound cynical, and before I go any further I want you to know that I’m certainly all for using affirmations, looking for the upside when the chips are down, making lemonade out of lemons and all things like that. I agree that there is always an “upside” to any perceived downturn, and vice versa and as mentioned in some of my previous posts, I believe that creating an intention is incredibly powerful.
Over the last few months I’ve been rather frustrated, mildly agitated even. There are people in my life that are wanting to create change in their lives. They are wanting to lose weight, change their career, improve their relationships, their health, their finances…in almost everywhere in every life area there are people in my world speaking about creating change for themselves. And yet, they are still stuck in the same place they were months ago…dreaming and talking about what it is they want to change, and waiting for that change to “magically appear”. What’s missing here?
Action…I’ll come back to this in a moment, but first I have to clarify something before you stop reading this because you’re thinking I’ve put myself on a high horse and am arrogant and judgemental b****.
Here it is; What I see in others is actually a reflection of the “stuff” I don’t want to or haven’t been able to come to grips with in myself.
Ultimately, it’s never about anyone else. These people in my life are showing up the way they are because they are inviting me to look at my own “stuff”, they are showing me the missing pieces, so that I can face it head on and move forward and get out of my own way. I like to think about it like I’m removing some of the obstacles, clearing the pathway if you will, to pave the road in front of me. Now, how’s that for taking any kid of finger-pointing, blame and judgement out of this all?
So, since my “pot has been stirred”, the question I need to ask myself is; Where have I been seeking change, creating intention and then coming short when it comes to taking the action steps needed to further what I’m doing? Turning things around like this an excellent way to gain insight and clarity, if you’re brave enough to ask and answer those questions.
This isn’t about shaming yourself, or beating up on yourself. For me it’s about getting real and clear about what I want to create for myself. In my example, it’s about making the changes, if ever so slight at first, to support the intention. I’ve really had to spend some time thinking about where have been resistant and fighting off the changes I know I need to make. Taking bold action has been a huge adjustment for me and many times I’ve felt uncomfortable. But I know that for me to fulfill my purpose, my mission I have to really get over what I think, others may think of me. Give up trying to live by what others expectations of me are, to not give up and keep pressing forward – no matter what. I can no longer avoid the situations that made me feel so uncomfortable and leave the “dirty work” to someone else. I’ve had to change so much about how I go about my day, and the way I used to do things. I’ve had to become disciplined and focused. I’ve had to use the word NO, many times over the last few months. I’ve had to step out of my comfort zone BIG TIME, ask people for what I want, ask the uncomfortable questions, follow-up (even if that means calling back more than once) and sometimes even be a b****. I’m doing things different, because I want change. I want the change more than I want things to stay the way they were.
“If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten”
So, let’s not mince words here. Here’s a little bit of tough love; What is it your truly want for yourself? What are the actions you need to take to bring you closer to the change you say you want?
Do you want to lose 20 lbs.? What do you need to do to make that happen? Make your plan, take action steps – even baby steps that move you in that direction. Be honest enough to admit when what you’re doing isn’t supporting your vision. Is that cocktail, that bag of chips, that fast food dinner bringing you closer to your desired outcome?
What about work? What about your relationships? Your finances? What are you willing to do to make your desires a reality? It may not be “easy”, nothing worth doing is, but the rewards are worth it.
I know I may have been a bit “cheeky” in my delivery of this post, please know that everything I share with you is something I have personally experienced, so I come from a place of sharing my insights in a sometimes non-traditional way in hopes to stir the pot, create impact and maybe inspire you to step into your highest vision of yourself! We all have it in us, it’s just waiting to bust out!
If this hasn’t given you a kick in the pants, I’ll leave you with this;
What’s the definition of insanity?
Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results – Albert Einstein
Think you could use a hand contact me through my About page and we can get started!